


Cold December Night

by Mamogirl



Category: Backstreet Boys
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Time, Christmas Tree, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Magical, Romance, kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 06:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12953316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mamogirl/pseuds/Mamogirl
Summary: They call it the season of givingI'm here, I'm yours for the takingThey call it the season of givingI'm here, I'm yours





	Cold December Night

Cold December Night

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_“So kiss me on this cold December Night”  
Cold December Night, Michael Bublé._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The colored lights could be seen from afar, it was just impossible to miss that big, giant and beautiful tree.

New York.

New York was always magical but it was something almost unexplainable when Christmas atmosphere filled the air, changing its skyline into a multiple fireworks that never ceased, never hit their end because their colored flames kept burning and burning, chasing the darkness and the night away. A winter wonderland, that was what that city turned into during that only month of the year, calling to its streets thousand and thousand of strangers faces that, just for a bunch of minutes, shared that experience together.

And so many faces were looking up to that tree, their necks straining because they couldn’t actually see all the decorations and the lights standing at its feet. Christmas music was running around those people, making them shivering with a chill of a memory or making them jump up and down with joy and excitement, making the couples stand a little bit closer and wrap their arms around each other, their love growing a little bit stronger just because of that magical atmosphere.

Nick wasn’t paying attention to the tree at all, his mind and senses taken away by the figure that was standing just a few inches from him. They had been the only ones who wanted to go and see the tree and, for once, Nick hadn’t been disappointed: he hadn’t wanted the others to come, he had wanted this moment to be just for him and Brian.

And the magic of Christmas and New York dressed up like that, as a fair that was just waiting for the right moment to come and help whoever was in deep need of a miracle.

“It’s really an amazing spectacle, isn’t it?” Nick asked, burying his hands inside the pockets of his coat. Actually, he would have wanted to do something else, copying the dozens of couples that were standing around them, hugging and wrapping themselves so they could be the closest possible.

Although, to Nick, the real amazing spectacle was watching that face that he had watched thousands and thousands of times before, that face that had been part of his dreams for so long that, sometimes, he would have preferred to keep dreaming instead than living in the real world. Brian’s face was an amazing spectacle because he had never looked that beautiful before: the lights fell perfectly upon those lines and those features, those blue eyes that were shining and so bright, as they had never been in the last years.

Brian looked beautiful.

Brian looked finally healthy.

Happy.

And, to Nick, that happy expression curved into a smile was seriously the only thing that could make him forget about everything, about their past and their mistakes, their doubts and their fears, and be happy as well.

But he wanted more.

He wanted to be happy together. Forever. Just like those clichés in the movies that he used to always make fun of.

“It is.” Brian replied, sighing as he looked up to the highest and brightest light at the top of the tree. He whispered silently a prayer, a wish that wanted so badly to be made true because it had waited years and years for that moment. Courage had to be drawn, strength had to be summoned because it wasn’t just like a movie, where it would only took the sight of that marvelous tree for words of love to fly all over them as if they were butterflies. So many things had happened between them, between those two friends that had fallen out and, almost at the brink of the end, had managed to save each other and that feeling that had linked them through thin and thick. But Brian was finally ready. He was ready to take that chance, ready to taste those waters and see if they would turn into a quiet and infinite ocean of happiness or, on the contrary, if waves and storms would be able to separate them forever.

Brian turned around, taking a few deep breaths while he tried to gather all the words he needed to say to make Nick understand. His confession. That one big, giant secret he had hidden for so long and it had almost cost him his voice and his life. Those feelings that had almost eaten him from deep inside, made him question everything he had ever learned and everything he had ever believed; yet, that love had been the one constant in his life, a secret comfort he had held on when things had gotten worse and rough and the one person that had always believed that he could make it through.

Why did he thought that something so powerful could be so scaring and dreading?

“You know. – Nick chipped in, a bright and warm smile on his face that made Brian’s heart flutter and fly a little higher. – I’ve always looked at those couples with such jealousy. I didn’t understand why all those people were so lucky to have met their other halves and I didn’t. It was so unfair. All I really wanted in life was to find someone who would love me for who I was and not just for, you know, being a popstar and everything.”

“You’re not jealous anymore?” Brian asked slightly confused. And frustrated and impatient because all he wanted was to get those words out before that window of opportunity would be closed once again.

“Nope. I think... well, I think I’ve found it too. Actually, I’m sure it has always been there in front of my eyes but I was too blind to see or notice it.”

“Oh.” Brian murmured, suddenly very aware that he was going to make a fool of himself. Idiot! That was what he had been! Idiot and stupid because he had waited for so long and for what? Just so that he could make an amazing and romantic speech, standing just a few meters behind that beautiful Christmas tree on the night before that magical day would appear. He had wasted time. Precious time because someone else had showed Nick what it meant to be loved.

“I’ve been a fool, Brian. I wasted years trying to find that something in people who had never been the ones for me. I wasted years fighting that person that had always believed that I could be more. That I was more than I could ever thought or believed. And then, one day, you wake up and you can finally see the truth: you can finally understand why  

“Yeah. That’s exactly what I was trying to... wait a minute! – Brian turned around abruptly, facing Nick with big eyes and a look full of misunderstanding and disbelief. It couldn’t be, his mind kept warning him. It could be, his heart whispered with renewed force and intensity. After all, why would a miracle happen if not during Christmas’s time? If not when they were both standing at the feet of one of the most magical Christmas tree in the whole world? – You... are you saying that you are in love with me? As in really really love me?”

A quick and warm smile curved Nick’s lips, as mind and soul started to comprehend that his most treasured and precious dream was finally starting to shape into reality.

“I guess I am.”

Never he had thought that that scenario, played in his mind a thousands and thousands times, would suddenly come alive. Never Nick had thought that, one day, he would stand next to Brian and hear him saying those words he had hoped, dreamed, wished and longed to. But, mostly, Nick had never thought that their roles would be inverted, with him being the one sure that it was all, finally, reality while Brian being the one who couldn’t believe, wouldn’t accept that it was indeed all real.

And truth is that was how Brian felt in that moment. Incredibly high, like suddenly he had grown a pair of wings and was finally soaring up in that sky and flying so close to the sun. But, at the same time, there was this weight, inside the pit of his stomach, that was trying to pull him under; a voice whispering in his ear that it was all a dream because how could it be that Nick, that someone like him, could and would love him just as much as he did? How could it be real that his heart and his soul had finally found their missing pieces, that half that would make them complete? Brian wanted to believe it but, at the same time, he wanted to be sure that it wasn’t a dream or a joke pulled out from a devil joker’s sleeve.

“As in feeling like singing all those happy love songs at the top of your lungs, without even caring if your voice holds on or if you are out of tune, and feeling as your heart is about to burst out with joy because you know exactly what those words talk about? As in feeling like you could climb that tree so just you could should out to the whole world how much you are in love and how much that special person is making you complete and whole once again? As in feeling like the world has finally stopped being only thousands shades of black and white because you have finally found someone who makes you see colors, bright and amazing colors when no one else does? -  Brian’s eyes grew even bigger, red points colored his cheeks and made him look more alive. Absolutely adorable, if Nick could add in that moment. – This is how you love me?”

 _“Yes.”_ That was the only answer Nick wanted to reply. No, not only reply. He wanted to scream so he would be sure that he would be heard. _Yes_ , just that simple word because he couldn’t and wasn’t able to find something that could match or be better than Brian’s words. As always Nick had been left speechless by the ability of that man to find the perfect words to explain what he was feeling in that moment, what Nick had been feeling since he first realized what love and loving really meant. He had never been to able to charge those emotions into words, he had never be able to summarize them as Brian had just did, lining them up in one of the most romantic explanation of love that Nick had ever heard.

And the truest.

It took Nick time to realize the truth beneath that mad, difficult, complicated relationship that his and Brian friendship had been through the years. It took Nick years to realize that the reason why he had been so hurt by their distance was because Brian attracted him as the sun would and kept doing with the Earth: he had followed him everywhere, he still would follow him even if Brian would decide to quit everything and live in the other part of the world. His words, his being proud or disappointed in him had been the weight in each and every of his decision and, ultimately, the main reason why he had decided to take his file in his hands and change it completely. And only then, just when his life had been finally put on the right path, Nick had known that the feeling, that hollow and longing feeling inside his heart was because he loved Brian.

And Brian loved him. Loved him in a way that no one had ever done before. Or could do ever.

It took Nick years to realize that what he had mistaken for disappointment and hate was, on the contrary, the deepest shade of a sadness coming from someone who could watch the man he loved self-destroying himself and that soul that no one had ever thought it could leave beneath of the layers and layers. Brian had always knew and believed that Nick could be better, that he was better and way more special and precious that than annoying and spoiled brat that preferred to hate everyone for the hard stuff life had dealt him with; Brian always knew that Nick could and was someone that could love and be love, could treasure and treasured, could protected and be protected.

Someone that could love and be loved by someone like Brian.

And Nick was tired of wasting time waiting for the right moment, waiting for the right opportunity to show Brian that he was already that person, that if he was the man he was now was just because he had found someone who challenged him, who put him in front of a mirror and showed him who he really was and who he shouldn’t and would never have to be. Nick was tired of wasting time longing to be the one showing Brian how special he was, no matter how many times his voice would still screw up some songs.

Two steps and gone was that small distance that still had lingered between the two men. Two steps and, just like stepping into a different dimension, the world around them just disappeared: no more children screaming and laughing; no more cheerful and romantic Christmas songs playing in the air in the background; no more voices chatting and cars passing by. The whole world seemed to shift, as if it had decided to place a silent blanket around their figures, closing them in a bubble where the only sound left was the one made by their hearts beating as one.

Nick placed a hand on Brian’s hip, smiling when he sensed that his skin trembling beneath his palm; the other hand found its place on Brian’s cheek, fingertips tracing that line that Nick had longed for oh so many, too much time and never had the chance to act on it.

“Yes, Brian. – Nick replied in a soft murmur that caressed Brian’s ear. – I love you as in standing in front of the biggest Christmas tree in the world and believing, no, actually knowing and firmly convinced that the brightest star is the one person that I finally get to hold into my arms.”

Without even hesitating one second, without even skipping a beat or caring for those tears that have decided to shine inside his eyes, Brian stood on his tiptoes and brushed gently his lips against Nick’s: that first caress was tentative, still a little bit scared that his miracle could disappear into the thin and cold without even a warning. But it didn’t happen. Nick didn’t vanished and neither did he step back, as if he had suddenly decided that this wasn’t really what he wanted or desired from their conversation or for their relationship. From the cheek Nick’s hand travelled behind the neck, literally pushing Brian against his body and blocking any chance or attempt to get away.

Though that was the last thing Brian wanted.

Their bodies seemed to melt into each other, as if they had finally found that place where they could be as whole.

Their lips found each other and sparks flew at the first contact, shivers ran through their spines and burned every single nerve that they found along their way. It wasn’t just a kiss. It wasn’t a normal kiss. It was soul meeting for the first time, a new language that had finally found someone who could spoke its words and understand its meaning; it was ocean and fire meeting together, blending into each other as if they couldn’t be opposite but two parts of the same whole: passion, love, desire and lust were the waves of that storm, thunders drowning out the rumors around them, so that there was only the sound of their heartbeats keeping the same melody, singing its note into a melodious voice.

That kiss felt like finally going home, like finding finally their guiding star and knowing that they would never be going to be alone ever again.

“I love you.” Nick whispered, mouthed upon Brian’s lips as they tried to gain back air but not really wanting to step away.

“Don’t...”

“I’m not. I love you and I’m gonna tell you each day. Each hour if it’s necessary.”

“Every hour?” Brian repeated, a smile that couldn’t be hold back and that betray the seriousness and the little uncertainty in his voice.

“Every minute?”

“I don’t want you to get tired of those words.”

“Oh. – Nick answered, holding a little bit tighter on Brian and brushing his nose against Brian’s. – I won’t even get tired of saying them.”

And there, right in that moment, a first snowflake started to dance around their faces, soon followed by its sisters and brothers. Because it was Christmas, they were in New York, and there wasn’t another place as magical as where they were standing.

Together.

**Author's Note:**

> I should be working on my Secret Santa fic and, yet, I couldn't not post something because I'm in total need of fluff and sweet and just romantic.  
> It's Christmas Time, right? XD  
> This is a oneshot that I've started last year but never actually got around and finish it.  
> So I've wrapped it up today.  
> Hope you'll love it as much as I loved writing it!


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